Christian Parenting in an LGBT Culture

For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who suppress the truth in unrighteousness, because what may be known of God is manifest in them, for God has shown it to them. For since the creation of the world His invisible attributes are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even His eternal power and Godhead, so that they are without excuse, because, although they knew God, they did not glorify Him as God, nor were thankful, but became futile in their thoughts, and their foolish hearts were darkened. Professing to be wise, they became fools, and changed the glory of the incorruptible God into an image made like corruptible man—and birds and four-footed animals and creeping things.

Therefore God also gave them up to uncleanness, in the lusts of their hearts, to dishonor their bodies among themselves, who exchanged the truth of God for the lie, and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever. Amen.

For this reason God gave them up to vile passions. For even their women exchanged the natural use for what is against nature. Likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust for one another, men with men committing what is shameful, and receiving in themselves the penalty of their error which was due.

And even as they did not like to retain God in their knowledge, God gave them over to a debased mind, to do those things which are not fitting; being filled with all unrighteousness, sexual immorality, wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness; full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, evil-mindedness; they are whisperers, backbiters, haters of God, violent, proud, boasters, inventors of evil things, disobedient to parents, undiscerning, untrustworthy, unloving, unforgiving, unmerciful; who, knowing the righteous judgment of God, that those who practice such things are deserving of death, not only do the same but also approve of those who practice them. (Romans 1: 18-32)

 What an apt description of America today! It’s hard not to see Romans 1 on display all around us. Our culture has become saturated in all forms of rebellion against God, not the least of which is the LGBT movement. No matter how you raise your children, they will be exposed. Children’s toys, cookies, candy, cereal, clothing lines, and cartoons have all become mouthpieces for sexual perversion. You would literally have to live in a bubble to keep your children from it.

As Christians, how do we parent wisely in this environment?

Don’t Hide Under a Rock

If you think this isn’t going to affect your kids, you are already denying reality. Our children are the number one target of the gay pride agenda, and they will be exposed to it in some form. Christians, even homeschoolers, need to be aware of it in all its ugliness. You may think their movement is stupid and gross (and you’re right) but it’s powerful nonetheless.

Paul warned us in 1 Peter 5:8 to “Be sober-minded, be watchful. Your adversary the devil goes about like a roaring lion seeking whom he may devour.” We can’t pretend this movement is too ridiculous for our attention. They are seeking to devour children. We must be educated and informed.

From the highest levels of government, throughout entertainment, within education, in professional sports, and in every form of electronic medium, we are getting gay and trans pride literally shoved down our throats. It is being normalized. We’re being forced to believe stuff that used to be fodder for the Babylon Bee.

If you’ve been in the dark about it, I recommend reading the Mama Bear Apologetics Guide to Sexuality by Hillary Morgan Ferrer.  It will equip you with the knowledge of God’s design for sex, all the facets of the LGBT movement, how your kids are already being exposed, and how to respond biblically.

Be Proactive

Parents, you must address these issues with your children before the world does. The world will (and probably already has).

This is why it’s so important to make daily Bible study the most important part of your day (personally, and with your children). They need to know about God’s design for marriage, sex, and families. They need to know what God calls sin. You cannot read through the Bible and miss these important parts of it. Before they are exposed to the world and its debauchery, they should know what God has to say about it.

Talk to your children, at whatever level is appropriate, about how God made male and female in His image (Genesis 1:27), and created marriage between one man and one woman. Show them where the Bible says, “I am fearfully and wonderfully made” (Psalm 139:14). God did not make a mistake when he created boys and girls. We are each a beautiful and unique creation.

Younger children can be introduced to the concepts in Romans 1:21-22 without openly discussing sex: “Although they knew God, they did not glorify Him as God, nor were thankful, but became futile in their thoughts, and their foolish hearts were darkened. Professing to be wise, they became fools…” This clearly explains (in the words of John MacArthur) that “Man’s search for meaning and purpose will produce only vain, meaningless conclusions,” and, “When man rejects the truth, the darkness of spiritual falsehood replaces it” (John MacArthur Study Bible, New King James Version). Even young children are capable of understanding that when we reject God’s truth, confusion and nonsense take its place.

If your children are older or have more probability of being exposed to these ideas (at school, work, etc.), address them head-on. Study Romans 1:18-32 together. Memorize it together. Help them to see the result of rejecting God and His design. They will be told at some point that homosexuality is not a sin. Show them otherwise. Take them to Leviticus 18:22, Romans 1:26-32, 1 Corinthians 6:9-11, 1 Timothy 1:10, and Jude 7. Teach them what an abomination is.

Ask them if they know people who call themselves gay or trans. Know what they’re seeing on the internet and talk about it openly. Ask questions. Discuss what they have seen or read, or what they will see and read. Point them back to the blessings of following God’s principles and the destruction that comes with rebellion.

If you have teens, get the book Love Thy Body by Nancy Pearcy. It is a straightforward, biblical treatment of this sexual age we are in. Read it with your teens, and discuss it together.

Be Confident

Christians can often find themselves in a position where speaking the truth feels harsh and rude. The truth is not rude, but it sometimes feels that way, especially when someone responds by calling you a bigot, or worse. We need to be confident that God’s word is the truth, and that by following biblical principles, there will be blessing. Our children need to see that we are steadfast believers in what the scriptures say.

Our children will be the adult peers of a very lost generation of souls. Kids who were convinced that they needed to surgically change their sex are growing up with depression, confusion, and are often suicidal. Children are being abused both sexually and mentally in the name of sexual freedom. We need to disciple the generation that will preach redemption.

Unfortunately, even Christians will not always affirm the truth of scripture. That means you and your children might find yourselves in the minority among your fellow Christians. Prepare for that. Pray for wisdom. Pray for your friends and family to see the truth. Love them anyway. And teach your children to do the same.

Shelter Your Children

Your children will be exposed to the gay pride culture just by going out in public. They may encounter the Fisher Price Little People drag queen figures on the toy aisle, or Oreo Cookies with Pride packaging at the grocery store, or an entire line of children’s clothing. Literally every corporation is flying the rainbow flag. But exposure does not have to mean immersion. This is why being proactive is wise. Be prepared to talk about these things as they come up.

“We need to disciple the generation that will preach redemption.”

I cannot overstate the power of a loving, God-centered home. While your children are young, embrace the time you have to be their primary influence. Build strong relationships. Guard their hearts and their time. As they grow older, and begin to participate in activities away from you, talk about everything.

How can I stress this? Let a biblical view of male and female, marriage, and family be the standard that is most prevalent in your child’s upbringing, and let the world’s confusion be so minimal of an influence that it’s shocking every time they see it. Don’t let your children become desensitized to sin and confusion.

Be aware of the reality that is everywhere. YouTube videos (or their commercials), children’s programming, and social media are all saturated. Please, keep your kids far away from TikTok. (If you don’t believe me, check out @libsoftiktok on Twitter to see what’s out there.) Know your kids’ friends, and what those friends are exposed to online. If you’re not sure, find out. If you can’t know for sure, make sure careful supervision is topmost in your mind when these friends come to visit.

Read my related post: Shelter Your Children

Equip Your Children

As we have already established, you cannot hide your children from this aspect of our culture any longer. It’s literally in your face everywhere you go. You may encounter “gay pride” at the store, or your children may be friends with someone who has decided to change their pronouns. What will you do when this happens?

If you’ve talked about this before it happens, you’ve done half the work already. Situations will vary with each of us, so let God guide you. James 1:5 tells us that, “If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all men liberally without reproach.” With the truth as your guide, God will give you the words you need in any situation.

A mom recently asked me how to help her child respond to another parent’s demand that her child be referred to as “they” at the city pool. Many children are seeing this daily in their schools and extracurricular activities. One school in Wisconsin already made the news for suing students over “saying incorrect pronouns.”

When (not if) your children are in this situation, they need your example to guide them. I strongly recommend preparing them for that now. Yes, even Christian homeschool families need to be ready. We can prepare them in a couple of ways… 

Through Our Words:

Communicate gently that the gay community is lost and confused. They are seeking satisfaction in a lifestyle of sin because they have rejected God and His design for them. (Many of them choose this path as a result of previous sexual abuse.) They need our prayers.

As Christians, we have the opportunity to show love and compassion to adults and kids who are deceived by the LGBTQ community. The way we talk about them in our homes and in public should show our children the love of Christ. Jesus taught us that all of God’s commands can be summed up in two: Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, and mind; and love your neighbor as yourself (Matthew 22:36-40). Even the militantly gay neighbor.

We must also show our children the difference between loving a person and approving of their sin. There may be an opportunity for you or your child to be confronted with belief about homosexuality. It’s important to know how to share the truth in love, and point to Jesus every time. If forced to confront the issues head-on, speak the truth in love.

Through Our Example:

Jesus told His disciples in John 13:35, “By this all will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” In daily interactions, the LGBTQ people we come in contact with deserve to be loved and treated as we would love and treat all of our friends. In our homes, we can talk about the current issues without being derogatory toward people, but we can discuss the issue as what it is: sin.

Pray together for those you know in that lifestyle. Pray together for guidance and wisdom. In your personal interactions, let love guide your words and actions. There may be occasion to share God’s truth with someone, and there may not. Violent, angry interactions will never lead another person to salvation.

All the Children of the World

This post is focused on parenting our own children in the face of LGBT culture. It is our responsibility to protect our children from sexual abuse and exposure. Our children are our mission field.

But there are other children out there who need protection, too. It’s a tall order to protect and defend all of these children! But there may be some small way you can help in your community and beyond. When you feel biblically equipped to handle this topic, consider hosting a meeting in your church, with the parents in your homeschool group, or even with a group of friends in your home. Use one or both of the books I mentioned above.

If you have a concern about your local schools (and you should!), get involved. Attend school board meetings, talk to parents of the school students about curriculum and assignments they’ve seen, and check the library for sexually explicit books. It may feel slow and hopeless, but it’s not. Every effort counts. 

Christians, we can stand by timidly while the world welcomes our children with bright colors and open arms into a life of sexual perversion, leaving them fruitless and perverted, or we can rise to the challenge that is set before us and arm our children with truth, confidence, and hope in this dark world. Let’s do the latter, and may our grandchildren thank God for us.